Autumn has finally begun in earnest.
And what else begins in autumn? Sports!
A ball game tournament?
Yes, it's this Sunday.
I'm burning with anticipation!
The ball game tournament and sports meet are the two big events in fall!
Is this tournament really that big?
By the way, your anticipation is burning out of control.
There are all kinds of ball games, though.
That's right. Which game is it?
Which game, you ask?
Dodgeball!
The Green Flame, Dodge Lee!
Dodgeball?
What's wrong, Lee?
You don't sound excited.
Do you not like dodgeball?
No, I wouldn't say I don't like it, but...
When I think of dodgeball...
So, how far are you in Narutimate?
I'm at the cave.
I'm at the Wind Tower.
Whoa, really?
Boys are so childish...
Childish...
It seems kind of childish to me.
It's not the dodgeball that's childish. It's the boys.
You're too soft.
Even softer than these cream-covered dorayaki!
Stop eating that!
Your blood sugar will go through the roof!
Listen, Lee!
Dodgeball...
...is a deep game that tests the most fundamental ninja skills!
It does?
Clearly you don't see it.
Fine, I'll teach you.
Okay!
This exhibition match will demonstrate the depth of the game of dodgeball!
Guy Sensei, for a ninja,
handling a large object like a dodgeball is nothing,
especially compared to a kunai.
Come on, Lee!
Oh, right.
I'm sorry, I know face hits don't count.
Um, uh...
Guy Sensei?
Hey, kid, that was too rough!
Take it easy, would you?
This again?!
It was an accident!
I didn't mean―
Gotcha!
See that?
In dodgeball, if you let your guard down for a second, you get hurt.
The "dodgeball" part was finished way before he got hurt.
A ninja must always secure his own safety,
and endure until his chance to strike comes!
That's the most basic part of being a ninja.
What a fearsome game...
I never knew dodgeball was so complex.
How I can I learn to endure like that?
Visualize, Lee.
See yourself dodging the ball.
Okay, I'll try it!
That's the spirit!
Visualize!
Our fall dodgeball tournament is finally underway!
As always, I'm your play-by-play announcer Shizune,
with Lady Tsunade on color commentary.
Hello.
Our first match pits Team Guy against Team Ebisu.
You're going down, Mr. Bushy-Brows!
Let's do this, Konohamaru!
Who do you give this one to, Lady Tsunade?
Five silver coins on Team Ebisu!
You're betting?
Here goes!
Visualize, Lee!
Visualize...
Yes, I will undulate like a gentle wave and gracefully dodge...
Why are you relaxing?!
Here comes the ball!
Lee!
You have to focus!
Why are you all nauseous?!
It's imaginary morning sickness...
You mean imaginary seasickness!
Time for Round Two, Mr. Bushy-Brows!
I'll just have to...
...use the drunken fist...
I see right through you.
Sexy Jutsu!
Lee is out!
You're such an idiot!
I'll get them!
Neji!
Gentle Fist,
Eight Trigrams, Sixty-Four Strikes!
Nice, Neji!
We're finished...
Team Guy wins!
Things looked bad when Lee was eliminated early,
but they won a hard-fought victory thanks to Neji's dedication!
What's your analysis, Lady Tsunade!
Just take it, you thief!
On to the semi-finals.
Team Kurenai!
Shino with a bug technique!
The ball has vanished!
This time, visualize!
Lee is out again!
Eight Trigrams Rotation!
And the opposing team is eliminated all at once again!
We're not done!
Severe Leaf Hurricane!
There's no need to blow away the non-competitors!
But Team Guy comes from behind and wins again!
Argh! I'll win next time!
It's time for the finals.
Team Guy vs. Team Kakashi for the championship!
We're taking this one, Bushy-Brows.
I've been nothing but deadweight to the team.
I'm useless.
Don't worry.
Just visualize and you can do it.
You keep telling me that, but...
The match is about to begin.
Which way are you leaning, Lady Tsunade?
Number 8 in the fifth.
You're betting on horses now?
Eat this!
Special Big League Rasengan, Version One!
Whoa, what the―
Tenten is eliminated!
Tenten!
I'm not done yet!
The same move won't work twice!
Byakugan!
What a maneuver! He's mixed the ball in with his Rasengans!
Where's the ball?
What a smart combination!
Naruto's Rasengans were just a distraction!
Eliminated
Team Guy is down to just Lee and Guy!
Team Kakashi is the real deal.
Lee is in deep trouble!
Don't give up, Lee!
Visualize.
You can do it! Visualize!
Guy Sensei...
Visualize, visualize...
I'm being persistent, aren't I?
But I'll keep on persisting!
This is just like...
Oh, persist?
That's it!
Get ready, Bushy-Brows!
Big League Rasengan!
The Drunken Fist?
But it didn't work last time!
No!
That's no ordinary Drunken Fist.
Lee!
Have you finally done it?!
One more!
One more round, Rock!
One more round, eh?
Come on, boss...
Mr. Guy sure is persistent...
It's always the same, the bar by the station,
then another round at karaoke,
and finally a big bowl of ramen.
I have to escape...
We're going all night, man!
Um, Boss.
Huh?
Sorry, I...
You know, I've got that thing, and...
I gotta get home.
Wife's waiting for ya, huh?
I get it.
Take care!
Yes, sir!
Sir! Sir!
He ducked it!
He ducked it like a man ducking a persistent boss!
Wait, that kind of ducking?!
That's it, Lee.
Keep on ducking!
Is this really the right lesson to learn?!
Man, what an effective way to dodge!
I've got that thing.
I've got that thing!
This makes no sense!
Why do you have to be a salaryman?!
Yeah, now counterattack Lee!
Be my guest.
Many thanks.
Balding Salaryman Whirlwind!
We lost!
Team Guy with another comeback victory...
Nice job, Lee.
I finally understand.
Dodgeball isn't just a sport for kids.
It's a very adult-oriented game!
I don't think you understand what any of that means.
Fall sports are best enjoyed as a family.
New Year's Grift
Anyone can make a mistake.
Even the most respected experts can be wrong sometimes.
What about this guy?
Den of Evil
Are you all right, Lord Orochimaru?
My plan failed again.
You kids have fun
I dressed as an old man for "Respect Your Elders" day.
Drink up, sing a song
I cared for an injured sparrow,
got a wicker rice basket as thanks...
Fact and fiction
And tried to catch those greedy Leaf kids in a trap.
But I forgot that "Respect Your Elders" day was last week.
They couldn't have cared less about an old man!
I think the problem is much more fundamental
than getting the date wrong.
Quiet, you!
I don't need to be lectured by someone weaker than me!
Excuse me,
but with the way you constantly fail, I think I'm better―
You didn't say that.
Tell me you didn't just say that.
What could you do better, you petulant pinhead?!
Pin... head?
Who's a pinhead?!
That does it. I'll show you exactly how capable I am!
The Yes-Man Says No!
Look over there!
You're my only friend...
Isn't that Orochimaru's underling?
No doubt about it.
He must be here to attack the Leaf again!
What're you doing here?!
Oh, it's you guys...
It's nothing.
Is he okay?
Lee, he's our enemy.
Stay on guard!
You're right, but seeing him that depressed worries me.
Hey, you can talk to us about it if you want.
Well...
You cut ties with Orochimaru?!
Yes.
I just can't follow that path anymore.
The way he uses his powers as a shinobi for such evil purposes...
It's just wrong!
So that's why you ran away.
Yes.
I was thinking...
Would you let me join your group?!
A-Are you serious?
I've always worked for him, I don't know where to go now!
I'm a changed man,
I just want to live an honest life, please!
Even if that's true...
I know, but I do feel for him.
If he's really changed...
They're such suckers for sob stories.
Kabuto's Ambition
The Path to Heaven
Youth
I join their group, get them to relax,
and slaughter them.
Bloodbath
Wahahahaha
That's the plan.
Ah ha, so that's what this is!
Fin
I'll show Lord Orochimaru that I'm even more powerful than him.
Hold it!
This guy used to be a double agent working against the Leaf.
I don't think we can trust him.
Very well.
Indeed, I understand where you're coming from.
But I swear I've changed.
I'll prove it.
Delete this photo?
Contact will be deleted
Deleted
How about that?
How about what?
You're just acting like a bitter ex-boyfriend!
Nothing will change if we keep doubting him.
If he's willing to go that far, let's give him a chance.
Yeah?
If you say so, Lee...
I don't like it, but I guess I'll go along.
Thank you!
They're so trusting, it's pathetic.
Now to make them lower their guard...
All right, if you want to join our circle,
you have to pass the test.
Test?
Rock Lee Ninja Pal Application Test
What's going on?
I said I wanted to join their team.
What am I doing in an exam room?
The test is about to begin.
As you can see we've got a lot of applicants.
But only one of you can become one of our ninja pals.
Do your best, everyone!
This is more like an audition.
Everyone here today is very excited.
They all assumed we'd be done after two seasons,
and they rushed in to try and ride our coattails...
...when they heard we were renewed for a third.
I'm not excited about anything!
Don't lump me in with these one-offs!
You could at least leave a little of the fourth wall intact.
Why do the guest characters even know that?
Regular character's arrogance
Anyway, I want to see just how determined everyone is!
Whatever, I'll win at any cost!
Break
Would the next five applicants please come to the interview room?
I'm up.
Excuse me―
What's Lord Orochimaru doing here?!
So you're here, too, Kabuto.
I see. So that's it...
I deduced your plan right away.
I'd expect nothing less, Lord Orochimaru.
So you had the same idea...
We're both trying to join them,
and strike when they least expect it, yes?
I accept your challenge.
Only one of us can win this contest.
And it's going to be me!
Let's see... First, tell us why you'd like to join the firm.
Firm?
What is this, a law office?
Hold it. If I'm going to be accepted,
I have to play along.
Go ahead, Mr. Kabuto Yakushi.
Yes, I feel like I can reach my full potential working here.
What textbook is that one from?
You could've said, "What is this, a law office?!"
and gotten a good punchline out of that.
We've already got a top-tier straight man in our firm.
Why do you keep saying "firm?"
Wait, were you talking about me?
See that?
Shoot, they wanted me to play along on a deeper level?
Next applicant, please.
Um...
Err...
He's too nervous to answer?
Good, Lord Orochimaru will lose points for that!
Um, I―
Department Store
Summer Sale
Station
That's about how bad I want to work here.
What kind of skit was that?
Expressing your desire like that is meaningless!
Wow, I really felt how badly you want to work here.
What?!
Not only do I see how much you want this,
but that made for a great setup, too.
Extra points for that.
It's shocking. The amount of stupidity is just shocking.
Next, tell us a little tale about your skills.
I've got a lot of experience with medical ninjutsu.
My tail's a bit longer.
That's quite a tale, indeed.
I see you're good with simple puns, too.
Extra points for that.
Darn it. I shouldn't have played it straight!
Morons, you're all morons!
And now the elevator pitch.
This is your last chance to really make an impact.
Make an impact... What should I say?
I'll go first.
What?
I win, Kabuto.
This story will have such an impact,
they'll have no choice but to go with me!
I won't die!
Because I love yo―
What a heartwarming story!
He wanted to prove his love would even protect him from death itself,
but in the end he was hit by a truck and...
Wait, that's the wrong kind of impact!
Impact
That was fantastic!
You played along at first,
and then nailed the punchline! None of us could've done that!
Even our punchline wizard Tenten isn't that good!
What do you mean, wizard?
I give you a perfect score. You pass!
Agreed.
Three points for Harataira!
Why were they betting?!
I-I... passed?
I admit defeat.
Lord... Orochimaru...
Kabuto, when I said you were weaker than me...
I was bluffing.
I wanted to force you to step out of my shadow. That's all.
You're a very strong man, stronger than me.
Lord...Orochimaru..
Good luck, Kabuto.
I'm sorry. I had no idea!
But I understand now!
You have a much bigger heart than I ever will!
I'm quitting as your new pal.
This was all part of my plan.
I was going to infiltrate your group and take you all out.
But I'm going to beat you without any underhanded―
You revealed yourself, Kabuto!
Serves you right!
Even if you hadn't quit, you'd still lose!
You think you're better than me?
Why you...
You were trying the same thing!
I could tell right away!
No fair! Outing me is against the rules!
This is what makes you a petulant pinhead!
That again!
I'm not a pinhead, you reptilian goon!
Moody brat!
What?!
The total number who passed:
Zero!
Womp wah.
Next week is "My First Five-Star Sushi!"
My First Five-Star Sushi! Friendship, Effort, and Victory!
and "Friendship, Effort, and Victory!"
Five-star sushi...
So if it's not on a conveyor belt, do we spin around instead?
Of course not!
Only mature adults eat at sushi places like that―
Understood.
So I should order squid,
then change it to sea urchin,
and then eat the whole thing,
and complain about the taste when I'm done!
You're not supposed to abuse your power as a customer!